Jokes … lol

Funny Jokes…Just Read & Laugh…lollllllllllll


Text Jokes

A man went into a fish shop and said
” Can I have some cod please?
The shop owner replied,
” We dont have any cod ”
So the man said ok then asked,
” Can I have some cod?
The chippy owner told him again that there was no cod. So the
man said,
” OK… can I have some cod?
At this the chip shop owner got really pissed off and said,
” Look mate we have no cod C-O-F-D, cod ” the bloke said,
” But the is no F in cod.
And the chippy owner said,
” Thats what I’ve been trying to tell you!!!

More Jokes

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One day, a woman died and went to heaven. An angel met her at the gateway to heaven and said ” Welcome to heaven. Everything here is perfect. You may do whatever you want. The only exception is, there are ducks walking around everywhere. You may not step on any of them, or you will be punished. After a year, if you have not stepped on any ducks, you will be rewarded. The woman agreed so the angel took her into heaven. She discovered a chain linked to her wrist, though she had no idea why, but then she realized that everyone else did, too. After awhile, the woman began to watch other people and see what happened. She saw a really pretty woman step on a duck because it had gotten in her way. She saw the angel go up to the woman, talk to her, and then chain her to an ugly man. The man said, ” Wow, you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. The woman said, ” And you are so ugly I can’t believe I stepped on that damn duck. After that she saw a handsome man step on a duck and swear. The angel went over to him and talked to him. Then he walked over to the woman and said, ” You have been good, so you are going to be rewarded. The woman was excited to see what her reward was. The angel then took the man by his chain and hooked it to the woman’s. The woman said, ” Wow, you are the hottest man I’ve ever seen. jokes-4 jokes-5 jokes-6

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